WEAK TOO

Once again, I'm in a more leagues than the average fantasy football fan. This year's leagues are as follows:

0-1 League of D's (Gruden's Buldge) - 10 Team PPR two player keeper. 8 seasons. This is my hometown league with friends from the Hicag.  Never made it to the championship. I came in 3rd place in 2008 and 2009, and haven't made the playoff since (unless you count the 2010 8 out of 12 teams playoffs). I'd accredit it to fierce competition...if it were true, but it's not. Year of Mardukas - 2014.

0-1 Four Loko Society of Lemoore - 12 Team PPR, one keeper. Last year 2nd place. bottom 2 teams get cut every year. This league was highlighted last week, no need to ramble.

1-0 ShutDaChuckUp - 10 Team, standard format last year 3rd place..  League with my wife's hometown friends, along with my siblings and their significant others. its only our second year, but there's good smack talk.  Mrs. Mardukas won last via a beatdown of my younger brother (sebastian).

1-0 XXXFL - 10 Team, standard format last year Champion.  Sebastian's friends made the mistake of inviting me into their league last year where they were quick to find that the man known as Mardukas is on a whole other level.

1-0 Operation Enduring Fantasy Football Freedom -16 team, PPR, bottom 2 team eliminator. last year 2nd.  Last year this was not a 16 team league, last year it more of a cluster fuck due to draft day ESPN.com issues that started the league off wrong and never fully recovered.  This year, we've retooled and i'm proud to say that it has the making of my best commissioning ever.  A weekly unicorn of shame is given whoever scores the lowest, the league championship belt is awarded to the weekly high score.  This is a work league, and the smack talking has started a little week, but should progress nicely as the season progresses.

0-1 Operation Enduring Fantasy Football Freedom (Navy Element) - 12 team, PPR. Another work league, but only Sailors in this league.

Last Week's Predictions Recap 1-2:

The Returning of the Reigning Champ took down Tx Midnight Cock as predicted, but not for the reasons I thought.

Team Lesnar back handed THERESA POEHLMAN and my prediction, reminding us that it's never safe to bet on Charles Cash.

Finally, had it not been one for someone not setting their lineup (No Bones!!) the Beatdown of the week would have been correct via a 51 point uninvited sexual encounter. Poor little Roz.

This week I'm highlighting Operation Enduring Fantasy Football Freedom, with three interesting matchup previews, my prediction for high scorer and lower scorer in the league, and round it up with my fanduel lineup.

WEEK 2 - Early Season Intra-Division Battle Royale w/ Cheese

Knee vs Knuckles The Battle of SIGINT Supremacy

Young Linwood Edwards and his magical Purple Jesus Juice are dealing with the aftermath of reaching for Tom Brady in the 2nd round of our 16 team draft, the result...Frank Gore as their number one back and neglecting the RB position again until the 7th rd.  This is one of the few weeks this year where he'll be projected to win due the 9ers facing my Bears' tragic run defense, and a swing for the fences waiver claim of Bobby Rainey.  The White Walters are a legitimate contender in this league, with no glaring weakness in his starting lineup.  One day the student will become the teacher, but not today.  The White Walters are my prediction for BEATDOWN of the Week, better luck never Young Padawan.

"It may be called Fantasy, but the feelings are real" - Jeff Strazzere

Two league heavyweights took one on the chin last week, with the defending champ, Average Bros Gym, not only losing, but receiving the year's first unicorn of shame and the West Chase Warriors stumbling out of the gates.  Both teams entered the season with high hopes, and loud mouths regarding their championship aspirations.  In such a big league in which division champions get an automatic playoff bid, its never too early to call it a MUST win game.  Neither team is particularly better than the other, with the Champs sticking with the enigma that is Trent Richardson and  the Warriors starting a past his prime Fitzgerald paired with an Oakland Raider (name doesn't matter in regards to Raiders and fantasy football).The Champ is currently benefiting from Justin Tucker's monster game on Thursday, but The Warriors have Steven Hauschka to counter.  This one will be close, but with the season being so young and the Warriors team being so old, he's going to get the best out of his Over-the-hill gaggle of receivers and flexs.  The Champ starts off 0-2.


The War of the (cubicle) Wall

Recent reports have been made that Team Roslin owner Shiloh (don't call me Guy-Blow) Roslin was rushed to the E.R. after Hot Pink Lipgloss owner Kristen French blindly threw a swingline stapler over her cubicle wall in the direction of young Mr. Roslin.  Details to the injuries sustained have yet to be release to the press, but an insider at Mr. Roslin's pharmacy leaked the fact that Mr. Roslin had to up his dosage of Tryact'n. (Try act'n like a man...get it??) Shortly after his return from convalescent leave, Guy-blow...in mean Shiloh, traded away his number 2nd round draft pick (Demarco Murray) straight-up for Colin Kaepernick.  Please note that as of 0930 this morning, Team Roslin still have Phillip Rivers in his starting line-up and Kaep on his bench. Meanwhile, Ms. French is proud new owner of Matt Asiata, who is projected to be the #1 back in Minnesota while AP's legal situation is sorted out.    No Lipgloss will be smeared this week.  Shiloh, say Hi to young edwards at the bottom of your division.

Championship Belt Prediction - Northern White Walters, again..I see no weakness on this team.

Unicorn of Shame - Purple Jesus Juice needs to get to church and pray for a time machine to swap out 2014 Gore and Brady with the 2010 versions of themselves.


Fanduel.

Last week I was 7 points out of the money, thanks to an underwhelming performance from Frank Gore against the putrid Dallas Defense.

This week, i'm stuck between to completely opposite lineups.

 



On the left we have my strategy of going all in on the top 3 ranked WRs and filling out the rest with gut feelings. Cassel vs The Pats is me sticking with my "revenge" game theory that players play better against their former teams.  I think Ahmad supplants himself as the #1 once again in Indy in a high scoring affair vs the Eagles on monday night.  I think the Giants focus more on the run this week based on what Eli showed last monday.

On the right, i went for homerun hitters, which is extremely risky, but sometimes you gotta swing for the fences.  Sproles, Giovani, Percy and Hunter are all big play threats and is each of them finds a way to do what they do best this week, the payoff could be glorious.

I'm leaning towards the right, but I really like the idea of having those three monsters leading my team.  Chime in if you have an opinion.  Otherwise, its less than two hours until kick off.

***BREAKING***
DAMMIT Carson Palmer is out this week.

Kick Rocks,

Mardukas.